hug me

Hug me!

I never was one to ask about being hugged and completely ignored the impact one big warm embrace could have on my mind. I never thought that I could be the one asking for one. it's not that it slipped off of my mind, but I'm pretty much withdrawn and always choose to nurse my wounds on my very own.

It wasn't until I met them that I realized how much I needed to be hugged. I never asked, but never needed to because it was given to me. After any traumatic event, any frustrating situation, any pain one of us could feel, always we received a warm embrace, a kiss on the forehead, a stroke on our backs. And always I noticed that while it didn't solve my issues, it made me feel much better. I felt I could stand another day..another month. Another year.

Hug me!

Don't let go of me, please. I thought I could do this alone, I thought I was strong enough but I realized I couldn't. I feel like I'm Atlas but even he needed help to carry the world on his shoulders. I don't want to carry the World on my shoulders, not alone per say. I don't want to keep my pain in my chest and wait for it to fester like a disease while I watch like an outsider.

Don't let me on my own. Yes, I'm asking you. I never do but right now, I'll make an exception. I am scared. I'm scared of tomorrow not coming. I'm scared of my life crashing down. I'm scared of losing control and not taking it back. I'm scared of losing you, all of you. I don't want to be afraid alone. I don't want to be afraid anymore...So yes, I'm asking you, wrap your arms around my frame, pull me closer, make me feel your warmth and presence. I need it.

I need you.