"I left King"'s landing because I wanted to find you."
Bäahal had no idea that her words would last in the knight's mind nor that they would have an actual impact on him. What was supposed to be a pleasant conversation between two people trying to figure things out, turned into the worst experience for the Targaryen. Jaime, in his true fashion, forced her to be honest with the reasons that had her leave the safety of King's landing to roam the land without a dragon and with just two young guards. Why was she so insistent about helping him get back on his feet? why did she even want to help him? she didn't expect her heart to pour so fast and so strongly and yet, it did. without her being able to resist, she was left open up about the feelings she had for him.
Love. the joy of telling someone you were in love with him and the dreaded rejection that ensued had to destroy the young woman. it almost did, but her love was too strong for her to fall apart. his rejection was his very right, and she didn't expect a man like him, who had been in love with one person who died -and who he couldn't break up with-, would never return the princess feelings. Lord Tyrion told her so, Ser Varys warned her about the pain of a broken heart and yet, she still stubbornly claimed her love for him. not once, but twice.
She was a fool, she was aware of that. A fool who fell in love with a man who wasn't able to return her feelings. A fool who still wanted to help the man and would do her very best to help him get better. A fool, who realized she couldn't take her with him even if he wanted because his very head was needed on a spike by his many enemies. After all, he was of house Lannister and while Lady Kyra would do her best trying to restore the name of her family, Jaime Lannister was a hated man. how could they? Bâahal secretly wondered if she wasn't cursed. how come the first person she felt love for, turned out to not only be a former enemy, but also a man who wouldn't love her back? was she destined to be heartbroken? to never find love? was it because of the heinous way she was conceived? or was it simply what it was because fate willed so. Ah, Fate... fuck fate!
She would forever burn in her memory the face of the man she said she was in love with. An "old broken knight" as he called himself that day, who shouldn't be redeemed, was met with love instead of scorn. someone who knew who he was and what he did, and yet STILL wanted him. A woman who'd been rejected so hard it would have broken, the floor if the rejection was an object, and who still wanted him. a woman he made cry. A woman he hated to see cry. A woman he desperately wanted to protect, especially from him and his twisted ways. Here they were, sitting on the balcony, staring at the beautiful view of Highgarden...for the last time maybe.
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