Sam believed Oya was a gremlin, or maybe a faery. Faeries were known for their pettiness and cruelty. They were violent little creatures and Oya surely knew how to be violent AND petty. Sam never met someone like her, invested in everything she did, invested in keeping him alive when they were working a case together, invested in them so much so that when someone else tried to orbit around him, she was quick to snap. He saw her jealousy and almost felt her blood boil through her veins whenever a pretty sweetheart flirted with him. She was possessive and it made him feel awkward and weird but in a good way because she noticed /him/. In the sea of every hunter he knew she could have been interested in, she chose him. Moose, the great goose, the tall Winchester brother, the least sought after by trucks of Dean's groupies. He didn't mind being the center of attention, not at all. He actually enjoyed not being noticed. He enjoyed his freedom, being able to work a case without having a widow drop her panties to screw him.
That didn't prevent Sam from having affairs of his own, rarer than Dean's but more meaningful than his. Ruby, Jessica, and the others. Even that one he phoned in when he tried to ignore Dean and rejected the hunter's life (well, he didn't per say, ignored him, he decided that his death WAS and should have been the end of the business. but that's digressing). Sam always fell and fell hard when he chose to become intimate with someone. He chose Oya, much to his surprise and to hers but after suffering so much, losing his soul, being possessed by crazy angels and all the maelström that his life became when Dean showed back up from Hell, Sam wasn't sure he had what it took to make Oya happy. They both knew they were broken, she told him so and in doing so voiced his own concern. She wasn't sure she could bring him all he needed in this life but she did, more than she could ever think she did. She brought him stability, a sense of normalcy, a sense of belonging. It was complicated to explain or even conceptualize but she made him feel alive again, human again, normal. From her affectionate little kisses on his cheeks and neck to her piggybacking him every chance she got, to her crying in his arms after a rather huge day and allowing him to comfort her.. all of that made Sam feel anchored to this reality and gave him Something more to fight for.
When she kissed him that night, after they argued over her benching him (to this day he doesn't know why she did it and didn't buy her shady explanation), it became clear to both that they were feeling the same way and yet, both weren't feeling at ease when they looked at their relationship just yet. they worked well together, they were strongly attached to one another, he would kill to save her life and so would she. He relished her kisses and signs of affection. he sought after them like she did. He felt at peace when she was sleeping next to him and she was having fewer nightmares by his sides. So, what prevented them from calling it what it was? Fear. fear of losing it if they dared name it.like it always happened. because he plainly lived relationships in the past who ended up in tragédies, Sam was convinced he shouldn't be that open. he shouldn't say the words, shouldn't openly label it and if he didn't, then she would be safe. strangely enough, she felt the same way and they came up with original ways to claim their feelings for each other. "I'm with you." was the code for "I love you." and all seemed well in the world.
So that explained why he was smiling the way he did in this picture he only agreed to take because she attacked him with kisses, her mischievous smile, and those damn adorable hazel eyes. Sam was a softie at his very core and she knew damn well how to play him like a fiddle. Or did she?
No comments:
Post a Comment