You are my person

A/N: Jessica belongs to my friend, this version of Asma also belongs to me

Xxx

« Where are you going? » Jessica's voice pierced the painful silence of the shop. She noticed the boxes on the floor, indicating the permanent closure of the salon. Asma froze and straightened up slowly, abandoning her packing.

« I thought it said 'closed' on the front door. » She didn't turn around and her tone was sarcastic. Truth be told, she wished Jessica hadn't found out she was trying to leave but she did. Jessica always did have a radar and appeared when she was most needed.

« You showed me where you put your keys. I couldn't find you at your place so I decided to check here.  Seems that I had the right idea. » She put the keys and her helmet on the counter. « What's this about? »

You couldn't really place Jessica in a box. Once you thought you figured her out, she always found a way to surprise you. At least that was how it worked with Asma. She surprised her from the start when she broke the false image Asma had of her because of her clients. Jessica wasn't a crow Eater like so many said about her. She wasn't an opportunist and was certainly meant to stay. She already had a change of heart when Jax and Jessica came and inked their names on each other's arms. It took some time but she discovered a side of them that moved her and forced her to rethink her perception of them. Gone were her prejudices and the false ideas of the pair she had. She saw two people who were in love with each other, genuinely in love and it warmed her heart. She later felt the need to apologize to the brunette and Lyla gave her that opportunity. To prevent the woman from getting a tattoo she might regret later, Asma called in Jessica. It was the very first time the two of them got to see each other since she inked Jessica and it was the very first opportunity they had to actually talk and get to know each other.

« This is.... It's obvious, isn't it? » Asma bit her bottom lip and looked up to the ceiling. Her pink-dyed hair cascaded onto her back and she shut her eyes tight. « I'm leaving. »

« No, you're not. »

« Yes, I am. »

It cost her to say the words and she was terrified. Asma usually hid her feelings pretty well and she could convince herself to feel good and even fake happiness but she couldn't anymore, not in front of Jessica. The masks started to fall when Jessica got injured and spent some time at the hospital. Asma was kept in the dark concerning Jessica's real activities. The knights? SAMCRO ? Crowley ? She couldn't tell anything to her friend because she knew the natural aversion to « illegal activities » Asma had. You couldn't blame her, she was raised by a Soldier and a law-abiding mother and unfortunately, her brother led the life of a gangster and died from it. How could Asma be ready to hear that Jessica knew how to use a gun and had her fair share of blood on her hands? Asma kept asking questions about how Jessica got herself into such a situation but was met with the same white lies over and over again, much to her frustration. It became a little better and lighter when Asma fell for a man named Elias Tobbins but it quickly turned sour. He was hellbent on avenging his wife and child deaths from the hands of the white supremacist gang who used to terrorize Charming's minority before they disbanded. This relationship wasn't viable and despite her best efforts, Asma kept giving into her addiction to Alcohol. Jess learned about it and helped her stay sober but when Elias dumped her for good and her ex-fiancé made himself known to her, Asma drank herself into intoxication. She came to Jess, spilled the beans and exposed herself as a broken doll who couldn't keep on going.

« No, you're not. Asma ! I thought we were past that already. »

« Past what? »

« You running away from me. I am here goddamnit! I am here and I will not let you go without at least making sure you'll be okay. » -Asma clenched her fists-

« Always being so good and so brave. Jess, you just got your boys back. Do you want me to remind you how distraught you were when they went missing? » She asked in a shaky voice, prompting the queen of Charming to furrow her brows.

« I do. I don't want to remember but I do. »

« Then you better let me go if you don't want to experience this shit again. » Asma turned on her heels and wiped some tears from her face. « I don't want to see you like this again. It was painful to watch, heartbreaking! I was looking for your boys when they went missing and being unable to give you a positive answer about them was killing me. If I don't leave, you might have to experience it again and I can't. » She said as she walked towards another box and started to fill it with her instruments.

It probably was one of the few moments she was allowed into Jessica's other world. A world where despite them being outlaws, Jax and Jess were just like your romance novel heroes. They were a family and a family that was in pain when the little ones went missing. She saw the light in Jessica fading away, her clutching her phone in a desperate hope of getting the stress-relieving phone call. That one good new that would allow her to breathe again after so long. It came, Crowley called her and she took care of Wendy and got the boys back -and that part was unknown to Asma even now- It was a sight she wished never to see again and one that motivated her to pray again. She, who had lost all hope and faith in a god who betrayed her returned to her roots and prayed every single day that the boys would return safely to their rightful parents. Wendy was more of an egg donor than an actual mother and Jessica had been to the boys more than a child could ever dream of. She was their mother and would always be. Asma knew she inked their names on Jessica after all and who was she to take those boys away from their mother? Jessica walked behind the counter and crouched in front of Asma and the box and put her hands onto Asma's hands.

« Look at me Asma, please. I need to understand what is going on. »

« I have to go, that's what's going on sugar. I need to go. »

« Y--You don't need to. Is there someone who's hurting you? Maybe I could-- »

« Someone isn't.... Someone would if I stay here. So I need to leave. » She bit her bottom lip and sat on her heels. Jessica noticed Asma was shaking, she kept looking past the brunette's shoulder in fears someone might get inside the parlor and tears were threatening to roll onto her cheeks.

«  Talk to me babes... » Jessica refused to have her friend go.

She remembered the night Asma came drunk and started to lash out at her before falling onto the floor and crying. She was hurt, lonely and desperate. It wasn't so much because Elias left and that relationship crashed. It was because she was scared. Someone hurt her very badly a few years ago and they found her in Charming. It was that evening that Asma mask fell for good and she told everything to Jessica. She told her about how sweet Oscar was when they were young, how respectful and caring of her he was and how quick he was to change his behavior once they got engaged. She told her about the abuse, about the violence, about the suffocating relationship she was in. She told Jessica about how dangerous he became and how deep into a life of crime he found himself to be. From an honest man and a caring fiancé, Oscar turned into a vile, unstable and violent man. She escaped from him and her brother who was visiting Chicago took her to Charming where she would be safe and could start again. Jessica listened to Asma speak and felt her heart fill itself with anger towards that man.

« This is why I have to go. If he found me here, he might go after everything and everyone I care about. You included and if he goes after you, the kids are in danger... Jax.. just imagine if it all happens when Jax isn't home? I can't afford to hurt you and I certainly don't want him to find me...I am trouble. I am trouble so I'm gonna leave. »

« Asma..you're not leaving. You came here to start a new life and you're gonna get this new life. I am so very sorry he hurt you. » She cupped her friend's cheek and gave her a comforting smile. « I think it's about time you know something about me. You trusted me enough with your secrets and I want to do the same. But you have to know if I didn't say anything before it was to protect you. » Asma nodded and listened.

It was a leap of faith from one woman to another. Jess explained everything to Asma, every little detail. It was a moment of truth for both of them and Jessica was anxious. At first, Asma was shocked and confused. She started to understand why she felt some of the stories Jessica told her were off. Her injuries made sense, the fact the feds were on their tail all the time, the fact so many members of the SAMCRO crew went to hospital during the same night the boys were kidnapped, the fact Jess knew the devil.. it all spun around in her mind and for a brief moment it was hard to swallow. She became silent and looked at her hands Jessica's fingers were holding and then looked back up again.

« The devil eh ?. »

« Yeah... » Jessica was short of breath, unable to breathe as she didn't know how Asma would react. It was a moment of truth for the two of them, a moment when the brunette laid it all out for her friend to see. A moment when Asma had the choice to either walk away or stay with her. Anxiously, Jessica stared at her friend for a reaction and was taken aback when she heard Asma chuckle.

« The.. the real devil? Ah.. AHAH.. AHAHAH »

Asma started to laugh and shake her head. It was a nervous laugh, a laugh full of relief and gratitude that her friend felt comfortable enough to tell her the truth. It was hard to accept at first, that the devil existed for real and that maybe God was real but she found comfort in that. She found comfort in knowing there was a place Oscar would end up to be and that Jessica might be protected from Hell since she was friends with the devil himself. It was surreal but relief washed over Jessica's face who also started to laugh.

« Yes! Yes, the devil! » She laughed heartedly and then held onto Asma's hands tighter. The pink inker looked at her after a while, allowing a couple of tears running down her cheeks.

« I have never told anyone about him... I never had the luxury to have friends back in Chicago..He drove my old friends away from me to keep me isolated. I didn't.. it feels.. it feels good.. it feels. It feels good. » She said as she put Jessica's hands against her lips for a soft kiss.

« I wanted to tell you everything when you told me about Oscar the first time but... I couldn't you see? I couldn't tell you because I didn't know how you'd react if you knew. »

« Fair enough. I understand. »

« Do you? » Asma nodded and pressed another kiss onto her wrist. « Asma. I meant it earlier. You're not going to leave Charming. You're not going to live in fear. He said he was coming to take you back with him, then let him come and he would see how we welcome those who want to harm my loved ones. » She then leaned her forehead against Asma's. « Especially not when they're my person. »

« you're my person too. » Asma whispered as she let out a sigh of relief and a nervous chuckle. « I am scared of seeing him again. I am scared of what he could do to those I care about. I don't want to put you in danger. » She whispered. « I thought you'd be better off without me. »

« Not even one bit. » She said as she gently pulled Asma into a hug. « You're safe here, this monster is not going to hurt you and if he touches even one hair of my boys, he'll have all hell break loose on him.. literally. »

She said with a soft chuckle before it faded away as she hugged her scared friend. Truth was, killing Wendy had taken its toll on her. It wasn't the act of killing or even Wendy's life she took. It was what she embodied for her family. The fact her child would ask after her when he would grow up and Jessica would have to explain what happened. It was the fact she might have hurt the boys in the long term that was filling her with doubt. But if she had to do it again to save Thomas and Abel, she would. If she had to kill Oscar to save Asma, she would. If she lost her in the process, at least she would have saved her friend. It felt good, however, to be able to finally be true to her and have all the mask off.

« I'll help you unpack. »

« Sounds like a good idea. » Asma smiled at Jess who pulled away and looked at her friend. « Jessica ?.. » The brunette lifted a brow and grinned. « Thank you. »

« You're welcome, you're my person. » It made her grin and Asma chuckle.

« Your person. » She repeated before Jessica poked her nose with her finger and then started to unpack the box in front of her. « You're my person... »

« I'm happy to be. »

(TBC)