Elpis: doubt

(Elpis)

When the world turned upside down, She planted her feet in the ground and refused to move. There was no way she would have sacrificed her feelings for Pride and bowed down to the other gods. Be pretty, smile, do as you are told: those were the marching orders, the mold Elpis was forced into. Pride was freedom. Meeting him set her free, loving him set her free but at what cost?

They lost everything. She lost him too. Unmade and remade into a colder, stronger and emotionally detached being, the sin was a new version of himself, free of their common past and whatever he was feeling for her.

"Surely I would make him love me again." She tried to convince herself. "Surely, he would see me..." she repeated like a mantra to build up strength and courage. The truth was, he didn't see her. He wouldn't love her. He hardly ever did in His older version. She had never been one to doubt, especially not when it Came to her feelings but ever since she was free and realized how lonely she was, Elpis felt doubt creep in her heart. Her older sister last words looped in her mind, comparing her love for the sin as puppy love and child's play. What if it was? What if she woke up to reality? What if there was nothing for her in this world but misery and solitude? It never lasted long, less than a blink of an eye but always she chose to ignore the fear and stand still because the only thing true in this world was the hopeless love she felt for the sin. It was what drove her, what kept her going. It was a conscious choice she made, to walk the path from hell and give him her Light.

But doubt had settled in, reminding her how painfully weak she actually was. Reminding how she had everything within reach yet nothing.