Klasma: a weird comfort

Klasma: a weird comfort 

// I just wanted to explore how and why she feels comfortable and tormented about Klaus.

xxxxxx

"You're doing it again!"  

"You're choosing our enemies over your sisters!" 

"Traitor!"

"WHORE!"

"TRAITOR!!"

Mary couldn't sleep. The voices at the back of her head were way too loud for her to be able to rest that night. She sat on the bed, and her heavy curls fell on her shoulder blades. Her lips were trembling and her body was shaking. Pain awoke as anxiety and anger mixed together clung to her guts. Both hands held onto her ankles as her golden eyes, almost white for they were brighter than ever, stared at the wall in front of her. She screamed and ran her fingers through her hair, holding fists of luscious curls into her hands to prevent her from sobbing loudly. A failure. Tears were strolling down her cheeks. She couldn't do otherwise but express her anguish through screams, tears, and her powers breaking her furniture. The more she was upset, the worse her pain got so she tried to self-soothe and think about something more pleasant. Come-on!. come-on... what could you think about, Mary? Oh... yes... Klaus' warm body against hers. She imagined his arms wrapped around her shoulders. The sensation of safety slowly calmed her down and her breathing slowed down. The witch put her hands on her chest, still feeling how fast her heartbeats were but at least, the pain was subsiding a little bit. 

It was a situation she didn't understand. For centuries she tried to get her revenge on Klaus for slaughtering her family. She wanted to kill him and had thought of the many ways she could end his life. Anger suffocated her, the feeling of being unjustly punished for an act of kindness was rotting her soul like poison. Because of him, because of him, she lost everything! Because of Klaus, she met Elijah. Because of Klaus, she helped Elijah and ended up being cursed by her coven. Her supreme sacrifice of innocent lives ensures Mary's immortality. She sacrificed those innocent people's lives so she could curse Mary to eternity without love, without the sensation of belonging, and without companionship. She should have hated him. She did. She did but she gave up on it because she couldn't be miserable. Hatred led to nothing but misery. Hatred led to nothing but pain and after centuries spent losing people she tried to help and watching them die naturally took a toll on her. So she chose to do otherwise. 

She understood him instead. She understood why he was the creature he was. She understood his pain, his loneliness, and his longing for companionship. She understood that he wasn't in full control of himself. How could it be different when he was the first hybrid this world had ever known? He was something that shouldn't have been and left a trail of death and desolation while trying to figure himself out. He didn't even remember when he slaughtered her family or the people of that town. He didn't remember seeing her. Everything was a fog for such a long time that holding grudges against him would be dishonest. It was destructive. It was useless...So Mary decided to do things differently, to find a new path. She would try to help him and keep on helping others so her curse would not be in vain. She could turn it around, and make it something positive, in a way, she wanted to be there to help others. She didn't plan to fall in love with him. She didn't plan any of this but it happened and she felt guilt at the beginning. 

Could she fall in love with the creature that destroyed her life? Technically, did he? If she was being honest with herself, he had killed her loved ones. That was all he did. Elijah was the one who talked her into saving his family and made her a traitor to her own kind. She fell for him and she fell hard. She fell so hard that she felt his absence even harder than she expected to feel. She was missing him. She was missing their connection. She bonded with him in ways she never thought she could, far better than she ever connected to her coven. Klaus understood her. Klaus felt her. Klaus knew her. Yet the voices at the back of her head kept coming back, threatening her, menacing her, spitting at her because she still managed to betray them with the very creature they fought against. Could she still be called a witch? A witch without a coven? A witch in love with the hybrid? A cursed witch. A witch in love. 

-TBC-