Doya: mother

//All the usual disclaimers//

"Mother, 

I keep trying to write you a letter but words fail me. The only thing that comes to mind is "I am sorry" for all I put you through. I am sorry for not saving you when I should have. I am sorry I let Kalusha hunt on his own and run towards his death. I regret that very night when I was frozen and unable to move. The Asanbosam could have killed me... no wait.. he did kill me. The day you died and my dear brother lost his life, I lost my life too.

Dad was strong. He tried his best to protect me and help me move on but then I lost Fabrice because I couldn't conceive and my world crumbled. My world crumbled mother. I wish you were there. I wish you could hold my hand while Father passed away. I wish I could cry against you and you would tell me everything would be better. But you couldn't. You were already dead.

Mom... I wish you were there. I wish you could guide me. I wish you could help me stay on track. I don't know why I am afraid. I am.... I am happy, mom. For the first time in.. I'm happy with Dean. We have our ups and downs and we bump heads every day but I am happy.

I miss you, mother...I miss you. I don't know what to do but I'll try and follow your lead."