// It's taking place after the slap. Mary's looking at a few pictures of Tommy and Grace and is reflecting on Tommy, his relationship with Grace, and her place in all of this.
xxxxxx
Grace Shelby institute, 11: 00 Am,
Mary was walking through the garden of the Orphanage. She needed some fresh air after she tended to the matters of the day. She enjoyed the sight of happy children, playing in the garden. Her green eyes set upon the large painting that was hung on the wall. It was a painting of Grace Shelby, the beautiful late wife of Thomas. Mary ran her hand over her dress, smoothing the fabric with both hands in a way to soothe her heart. Tommy loved Grace, he loved her despite her betrayal. He loved her despite her desire to have him leave the mobster lifestyle. She was the mother of his child, and this could never be changed. She had been a friend, a caring ear, and a strong shoulder for him to rest against. There was no denying that Grace had saved Tommy with her love. She put him back together, breathed new life into him, and built a family with him.
In a way, she helped him feel grounded and gave him something to return to. He had a family of his own, a wife, and a child. what more could he ask for? Well, it was Tommy fucking Shelby, and he wanted everything. He was a man of devouring ambition, a man who couldn't accept living an uneventful life. He needed a challenge, he needed competition, and he needed absolute control over the life he was leading. He couldn't be satisfied with just sitting at a desk, shaking hands, and calling it a day. Tommy would whither if he stopped moving if he stopped fighting. Nobody could make him go 100% legitimate and leave the family business behind. Nothing could. Not Grace, not Charlie, not even the rest of his family. Grace didn't understand that. She didn't understand him, and maybe down the road, she would have felt the weight of his lifestyle upon her shoulders.
Mary yanked her head back and closed her eyes for a while. She had witnessed Tommy turning cold after Grace died. He buried his emotions deep inside his heart, leaving little to almost nothing surface. He became harder to read than after WWI, and she understood that it had everything to do with falling in love and opening his heart to someone. Grace's death made him believe that he was cursed and that made him wary of getting closer to someone else. He tried, really, he tried, but here came Mary. She lived in the house, took care of his son, and managed to even break his sleeping habits by coming to his bedroom at night. Here came Mary, with her chaotic desires, her chaotic life, and her rough edges.
"I will take care of them, Grace. I will do my best to keep them happy." - She said but she wasn't sure of herself.
Truth be told, Mary hadn't fully opened up to Tommy. She never had to talk about her late son Paul, or her late husband Carter. She never had to break down in his arms or express her fears. Mary was open about plenty of things but nothing that hit too close to home. Could she tell Tommy she was afraid he would use her like her late husband did? How could she tell him that she believed she couldn't be loved because of the past traumas she suffered from? How could she tell him that she wished she was a good surrogate mother to Charlie or that she loved him so much she wanted a life with him? How could she tell him that his presence soothed her fears, that she didn't think of the mistreatment, the pain, the horrors she'd suffered from in the past? How could she tell him that when he left his home, the only thing she wished was to see him at night? Mary didn't think she would be a good lover, she didn't think she could keep her promise to Grace, but she knew she wanted to give it a try. She was still discovering herself, still learning that she was comfortable with a life of crime and was comfortable with who Tommy was.
"I can't live up to your memory. I'm not trying to. I don't know why Lizzie believes I want to be you. I don't. All I want is to make your boys happy because they make me happy. They make me happy..."-She wiped her tears and smacked her lips together as if to snap out of it. "I will do my best, I can promise you that I would give everything I have to love them." -She closed her eyes- "I love them...." -She then resumed walking.
In Thomas Shelby's house, there was a son, a father, the memory of the child's mother, the maids, and Mary.... Mary who was more than a friend, who wasn't invisible, who wasn't just a booty call. In Thomas Shelby's house, there was a woman who loved both Tommy and Charlie Shelby, a woman who was still struggling with her story but who was willing to move forward, to the light, to a happier life with a man who understood her, a man she understood.
-TBC-
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