A/N: Ah Zeus, (from My New Boss. You can find information in my articles) is having a very hard time. He's just learned that his former fiancé is heavily pregnant with her husband (and his best friend) and it just threw him back to when he acted like a fool and lost her for good. Heavy themes here. I needed a perfect way to convey some dark emotions and Zeus gave it to me. It's just him thinking of himself, not necessarily how others perceive him save for « he's an asshole ».
Xxxxx
« I am 8 months old pregnant Zeus. It's one of the reasons I don't want to visit you. Old wounds might open again and I've just healed from what you did to me. Don't ask me to come see you. You very much know I would not come over. With Love, Margot. »
Pregnant. She was pregnant! Of course, she would be. Zeus found himself staring blankly at the screen of his computer. In a moment of weakness, he reached out to his two only true friends.Paul Kingsman, his childhood best friend and Margot Kingsman, Paul's wife and Zeus former fiancée. He would talk to both, usually Paul over the phone and Margot through e-mails. After all these years it was a miracle if Margot wanted to talk to him altogether. He treated her very poorly years ago. She knew about his life, the untold story of the Olympian family. She knew about the way he was raised, the abuse from his father, the physical and mental scars it left on her fiancé. It never made her look down at him, if anything, she pushed him to become the successful man he was today. Margot was a rare one, brave, resilient and understanding. She loved him more than he deserved even when he rarely was at home because he worked very hard to clean the name of his family after his father was exposed for being a fraud. Margot stayed by his sides even when he virtually became poor and he had to work even harder to provide for his family.
When she told him she was pregnant with their child, Zeus was the happiest man on Earth. He swore to God and the other gods on Earth that he would take care of his child unlike his father did to him. He promised to himself and to her that he would be a different man than his father was and he was excited and thrilled about fatherhood. Zeus started to picture himself bonding with his child over sports if it was his child's interest, or science or frankly whatever his baby would want to do.He wasn't discriminatory. He was not going to fight his offspring regarding its preferences or its identity. He simply wanted his child to feel loved, welcomed and worthy.
Unfortunately, life happened and Margot got sick. Her pregnancy wasn't too far advanced so she miscarried. Zeus was distraught and snapped at this moment. He started to ignore her, came late at home, sometimes didn't even check on her. We could say, he abandoned his fiancée right after she had a miscarriage and later on dumped her over that very tragedy. That was an asshole move. He was an asshole he knew that. He refused to talk about the loss of his potential child, mostly because it hurt and he was ashamed of the way he treated Margot. She was the one who needed him the most and he abandoned her. Plain and simple. He left.
He left because he was scared. For him, it had to be his fault. The fetus couldn't have been viable because he was defective. The child couldn't have been born because it had half of his blood running through its veins. The child couldn't have been a good person anyway because it was his. The mental abuse his father put him through resurfaced as soon as Margot lost her fetus. It wasn't her fault and he never blamed her for it, it was his and his only. How could /he/ produce anything good? He had tried, his company was working but he was feared. People hated him because he was merciless and a shark. People hated him because of his good looks, almost inhuman features and he attracted many people. People hated him because he was the son of his father. Hercules was a fraud, he stole money from so many people rich and poor alike and ruined their lives. He worked along with the Irish mob in money-laundering and put his own son's life in jeopardy. If it wasn't for Kerri Jensen, Zeus would have died on that elevator from the gunshot he received from the mafia's goon.
Zeus roamed his hand over his face, angry at himself about how his life turned into. He fucked up. He knew he fucked up and he wasn't able to fix anything anymore. Margot moved on from him, she found a good man to attach her life to. Paul was a very good man, the best she could have ever found in Zeus' opinion. He loved Margot and from what he told Zeus, she did have a very good life. Margot was better off without him but still. It stung. I should have been his baby. They were supposed to be destined to each other. It should have been his baby and he fucked that up too. He ruined everything he touched, thank you, dad, for that! Hercules always told his son he was a good for nothing, that he was responsible for his mother's suicide, that he was a disgrace and a shame and he wished he had had another child than him to be his heir. He kept forcing Zeus into becoming a monster just like him and after all these years fighting his dad, Zeus realized he was just like him. He became an asshole in order to fight his father and undo the harm he caused others and would most likely end up being alone like his father.
Ah.. wouldn't that be fitting? For him to end up alone like he had always feared he would be? The news of Margot's pregnancy reignited a fire inside of him, opened a wound back. It destroyed him if he was being honest with himself. She was able to move on with her life, be genuinely happy and welcome a new life while he was denied all of it. Well.. not completely. Of course the new prompted him to propose to Irina Tchekovka, the supermodel who happened to also have a master degree in biochemistry. They have been on a long on and off relationship and Irina was truly a keeper. She was simple and kind and loved him despite his many flaws. She was very good to him and yet, he knew he would break her heart. He loved her but wasn't « in love » with her. Never was and never will.No. To make things go from bad to worse, he did fall in love with someone else. A newcomer in his life, the beautiful Asma Jensen.
Asma came into his life like a storm. She wasn't planned, wasn't welcomed -despite him promising her mother he would hire her daughter as a thank you for saving his life- and ultimately had to suffer his mistreatment until she proved herself to be worthy of his attention. She was resilient and good, caring even. She took care of him when he was drunk when he was still hurting from the gunshot wound when he was finding himself in predicaments. She proved herself to be useful to him, but more than that. She saw the asshole he was and stuck by him despite that. She was able to get him at the most genuinely around her, get him talk about secrets and feelings he kept to himself, made him fall in love with her. Shit ! That was it! He was in love with her but he broke her heart several times already. She couldn't possibly still love him when he was being so heartless. No ?
Well, even if he had a reasonable doubt, Zeus knew that she would not forgive him after he proposed to someone else. He chose Irina because she was less problematic and far away from his real issues. She was oblivious to what he was doing, of his mission to undo the harm caused by his father and his willingness to mingle with a known criminal to get the job done. She was convenient and practical and he cared about her enough to see himself married to her. He chose Irina in spite of Asma claiming her love for him a few days ago. He told her that he would break her heart because it was what he always did. He took everything from people only to smash their hearts onto the ground and stomp on it with his heels. He destroyed. He fucking did. And the day she learned about his engagement (through broadcasted news Tom put on purpose), he almost could hear her heart break. He watched as she stiffened and held back tears so she could save face and later on when she went to his office, she simply congratulated him on his engagement and put her reports on the table. He didn't say anything, what could he say save « Thank you » and she left, but it didn't escape from him that she was distraught.
He had two hearts in his pockets and he already knew he would destroy both of them. Nothing could go right because he didn't know how to do it otherwise. He simply took and took all that people had to offer to him and then he destroyed every little thing he had built with them. Paul blessed his soul, was by his sides only because he was a loyal man with principles. Margot stayed because they were childhood friends and she knew him more than he did know himself, even though they never met face to face after he left. She stuck to writing him emails and occasionally have him over the phone but not more than that. Seeing him was too much for her, too painful and it was better this way for him too. He was better off alone, wasn't he? But could he be? Zeus knew that he desperately needed company and wouldn't do good on his own. Maybe that made him a slut but all these years going from one bed to another was only the result of him trying to find another Margot. Irina was his Margot. Asma was a forbidden fruit. She already had a bad taste of how painful it could be to live with a man like him so he didn't try to think too much about it.
That was his excuse. It all fell down the drain whenever he saw her beautiful face. She had to force herself to spend her days by his sides. It was her job, she was his personal assistant, which made it even more painful for both of them. Zeus had to pretend he didn't care, but he could see her heartbreak and in return, it broke his heart. He could have easily said yes and tried to go out with her, but he didn't and deep down, he knew that it was because he was afraid that something worse might happen to her. He was afraid that she might even suffer more than she already did because his love was toxic, his genuine unbridled love was a catastrophe and it was better if he saved her from all of this, from himself. That was why he chose Irina. Because it was the easy way.
But they would both suffer from his hand. They would both suffer because of him. It was always his fault, wasn't it?
(TBC)
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