"I admire you, Ada. You were able to move forward after the death of your husband."
Mary was still holding a glass of whisky. Ada came for a little visit and the two women ended up drinking together and reminisced about the times when John was still alive. They also talked about Ada's children and Charlie and little by little, they focused their conversation on themselves. Mary had always admired Ada's hard head and bravado. Ada was a no-nonsense woman who refused to be disrespected. She had endured the negative reaction towards her bi-racial child and had never let it interfere with her child's happiness. If anything, she was fiercely protecting her children, while also allowing herself the right to be happy and pursue that happiness. Her husband's life was over and had been for a decade by now, but hers was just at the beginning. She still had a lot to do and to see such a vibrant woman comforted Mary.
Tommy's sister, however, felt that Mary was selling herself short. It was one thing to marry the love of one's life and to lose it to murder. It was another one to actually survive through the shitload of abuse Mary Colson went through and still keep a gentle heart. Surviving was not the most admirable thing about Mary. Everyone survived but not everyone kept a kind heart like Mary did. Not everyone could still see the good in people like Mary did. Not everyone was willing to give another chance at life, at love, at happiness like Mary did. Ada was admirative of that and she wanted Mary to be able to see it as well. While Mary was still drinking, she lit up a cigarette and slowly blew some of it before she said.
"You managed to do just the same, Mary."
"I didn't love my husband. I thought I did but I was just a child. After the death of our son, I grew up. I realized that I didn't love him but I hoped he did. I had no one else but him. When he died, I felt relieved."
Mary shook her head and furrowed her brows at Ada's reply. How could she say something like this? She blushed and set her green eyes upon the Shelby. Ada curbed a brow, not because she didn't agree with what Mary was saying but because it still wasn't grounds to admire /her/. Ada went with the motion. It was hard as fuck to survive Freddie. It was difficult but she managed to keep going, one foot after the other. One day after the other. Mary fought against the odds and even then, even after she succeeded, she still believed that she didn't do enough, that she wasn't enough. That was a mindset Ada wanted to snap her out of. If anything, Mary proved that she was more than enough.
"There's nothing to admire from me. I just did what I had to do for our child. I just did what I had to do that I knew he'd want me to. "
"It takes a lot of strength, Ada. It took me so long before I felt the desire to live again. It took the love of Charlie... It took Tommy... It took your family for me to actually start to heal. For so long I felt like a walking corpse. Walking aimlessly and feeling numb. I didn't have a goal and I felt that I had nothing to look forward to. I just...I was lost for so long, Ada. So fucking long." -She said, taking another sip of her whisky. Ada's blue gaze softened and she blew some smoke before her free hand gently held onto Mary's.-
"I understand. More than you know. I understand exactly what you said. I just couldn't fail my child back then and I can't fail my children today so...I have to keep moving. Mary, I admire you as well. I think that it takes a lot of guts to endure all you have to endure and to survive. You managed to build a life for yourself, to find your way back to life. Ever since you came into our lives, I have felt better. Tom's happier... Charlie too. You're kind. I am not. You're still kind despite what life gave you and this.... this I admire." -Ada then squeezed Mary's hand who smiled at her-
"You shouldn't be admiring me, but... I do appreciate the kind words you have for me. I didn't know you thought this about me."
" There are a lot of things I do think. I don't always have the time to speak on it or my brother doesn't have it in him to listen to me. Still... I am happy you're in our lives, Mary. And it's not too far-fetched to think that we all do."
She blew another smoke and leaned into her chair but before they could eventually keep talking, a loud cry could be heard in the living room. Elisabeth was crying, which alerted Ada who quickly stood up and waltzed to the living room, only to find her daughter cut open on her forehead, her older brother was trying to dab a handkerchief on her forehead while Charlie was running out of the room. He bumped into Ada who asked him what happened and he explained that they were running around and Elisabeth hit the corner of the table and ended up cutting her forehead up. The two women looked at each other and Mary nodded. She would quickly take care of it and make sure she would stitch Elisabeth up so there would be no deep scar left. Ultimately, wasn't it how chaotic life was supposed to be when there were children? Strangely enough, this very mundane thing reassured Mary. All was well. All would be well.
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