GOT (modern): Deep thoughts in the bathtub

Bäahal sat in her bathtub. Her legs were pulled up so she could wrap her arms around her frame. Her purple hues stared aimlessly before her. Her luscious white locks were tied in a loose bun so they wouldn't get wet. She could feel it, the warmth in her heart and a newfound calmness she was slowly getting used to. Jaime told her that he was ready to step out together with her. He told her he loved her and he wanted her to be happy. If that meant being out in public, then he would try his best to make it happen. Knowing that he was willing to face the scrutiny of the public and the wrath of both their families comforted the heiress more than she expected. Suddenly, she wasn't fighting alone. Jaime was with her. It made her smile and she leaned her forehead against her knees. Everything would be alright. 

The young woman knew all too well how negatively her siblings and extended family would react to the news of her dating a Lannister. She knew she was going against the family feud her father started with Tywinn Lannister. She knew that Daenerys would take it for betrayal and she would actively reject her sister because she went against their father's wishes. She knew Viserys would loath her, and rightfully so since he hated the Lannisters. It didn't matter how sober he was, this hatred for the Lannisters existed long before he was an adult and his constant public beef with Cersei Lannister only further demonstrated just how much he loathed this family.  They would not take it well but Bâahal didn't want to sit around and wait for them to approve everything she did. If she did, she knew she would have to kiss her freedom goodbye and that was not something she wanted. 

it felt good to be able to finally have something for herself. She was free to be friends with whomever she wanted regardless of how her family would take it. Kyra Lannister was her best friend, her only friend for that matter, so why would she hide this relationship from the world? The same goes for her relationship with Jaime. She was happy when she was with him! Why would she keep it to herself? Yes, of course, being a public figure would always come with unwanted attention and the paparazzi were ready to photograph her at any candid moments (especially if these were embarrassing). She knew that people would look at her and pretend they knew everything about her. She knew about their judgment and grew up being judged for being alive. What would be new? What would be new if not just her being happy for once? She shrugged and held her legs tighter.  She could do this! She could step out with Jaime as her lover and Kyra as her best friend and would be strong enough to face anything that would come their way.  Perhaps, living her truth with a good support system would actually give Bâahal the stability she was looking for. Perhaps....

Got (modern): I love Kyky

Kyky here is my best friend. I already know that some of you bitches would try to dim our light and go off in conspiracies. Please suit yourselves. 

I know what I know. 

I know she’s the apple of my eye, the sister from another mister, and the support and love I never got from my folks. 

She never judged me. She never picked me apart. And her love is not conditional. 

She showed me that in an ocean of faux business, some business is genuine. 

She showed me that I could be loved and I had a wicked sense of humour too. She showed me it was okay to be vulnerable with her because she wouldn’t use it against me. 

I love her. Through and through! Always and forever no matter how much our families hate what we do!

GoT(regular) : Dearest Kyra

Dearest Kyra,

Ser Tyrion informed me of the delicate situation you are stuck in. I offered to help but he told me that after the siege I should be more careful with what I was doing. 

I am writing quickly because my visit is long overdue and I shall take the road to Casterly Roc.  It is not lost on me that men fear women in power. Look at how they reacted when my sister sat on the throne. Look at what they did to me, to hurt her. I cannot stay passive so I am coming to your aid. 

With love 

Bäahal Targaryen 

Princess of the Seven Kingdoms.

GOT shorts: Friendship

Lady Kyra Lannister was the princess' first and trustful best friend. She was a nervous wreck since her sister, Queen Daenerys gave her blessings to her union with the knight. Nervous, not because of the hardships to come but because she would become part of the Lannister family. She would become Lady Kyra's sister and thus would share a bond that transcended friendship. Bäahal wanted to be a good sister, maybe the best sister Lady Kyra ever had and perhaps that was putting way too much pressure on her shoulders than it should have. Bäahal was excited, more than anything she was happy. Lady Kyra, Ser Jaime, and Ser Tyrion would become part of the family.

xxx

"I love it when we make time for each other. I am not used to being able to just hang out with someone and unwind and talk about whatever crosses my mind. With you, I can be silly. I can openly cry, I can be whiny and cheesy! With you, I can be "me" and it feels so damn good. I just... love you okay? So please, stay in my life, stay my best friend...Stay."

GoT: Dearest Kyra

Dearest Kyra, 

I have not heard from you for a long time now and I cannot hide my worries. Your brother, Ser Tyrion, told me that you've been dealing with issues on your side and I wish I could be of any assistance. You know that whatever you need, you just have to ask for my help and I will deliver it as swiftly as possible. 

I have to say, I am missing your company. I miss our long conversations by the fire. I miss spending time with you and discussing the world and our desires... Tell me, are you happy? Now that you have new responsibilities, do you feel fulfilled?  if yes, do you know what you'll set your mind on next? if not, what do you want to do? where do you want to go? What would make you feel alive again? 

I am truly looking forward to seeing you again, because this time you will be my sister, and I long for a warm embrace. 

until then, please know that you have my eternal friendship,

Best,

Bäahal Targaryen

Princess of the Seven Kingdoms.

GoT (modern) : Returning Home.

Naath Radisson Blu Hotel: 

Knock... Knock... Knock

Bäahal had waited, perhaps an hour before she finally went to Kyra's room.  She was a little nervous wreck because it was the first time since the death of her mother that the silver head went to her birthplace. Naath was a beautiful island, filled with white-sand beaches and turquoise sea. It had a luxurious forest where animals -some of which were only native to the land- flourished and it was home to the most beautiful flowers. It was a treasure chest, perhaps one of the last where the inhabitants had the means to care for the land's riches. Either way, for Bäahal, it was home. She was born there and grew up until she turned 12. She knew the roads that led to the sea by heart and could remember the peculiar scent of coconut water. She remembered the smiles her mother gave her and their dances together. So, as a good friend, she had to share her treasure with Kyra Lannister. 

Kyra was Bäahal's first true friend. She was the first to see her for the content of her heart rather than the name she carried or the wealth she had inherited. She wasn't a Targaryen when she was with her friend. She simply was Bäahal. A young woman who loved to dance and wanted to make a career out of it. She was mischievous and kind (and a little softie at heart). She loved to make bad impressions of her siblings and her parents and upon landing at Naath, the silver head realized that it had been years since she last imitated her mother. Could she even gather the strength to visit her grave? Would she be able to even mention her without turning into a mess? Why was she thinking about her mother while waiting for Kyra to open the door?  She didn't know. 

~ Maybe she reminds you of your mother?~

The thought made her blush. Kyra was... different. She wasn't a spoiled brat like most rich kids were. She wasn't vain or vapid like most of them were. She had ambition, she was an artist. She painted -true, she did and Bäahal had seen one of her auto-portraits- She designed clothes and Bäahal had become one of her muses and her model. She was just like Suni, Bäahal's mother, who was an all-around artist. She sang, danced, painted and sculpted. Her daughter admired her warmth and the way she loved being alive. Life was worth living and to quote her mother, there was always a tiny bit of light even in darkness. Kyra was living proof of her mother's saying. She had to fight most of her life and despite dreadful circumstances, she was able to rise above it. Kyra welcomed her without any questions. She listened to her and comforted her when her heart was broken and panic had settled in her heart. Kyra had given her strength and loved her when no one else did. So lying to her about dating Jaime was making her feel uncomfortable. He requested it and she was loyal to him. He wanted to sort things out with his father and didn't want to bring drama into their lives. She would have to wait some more before she told the truth to Kyra and was hoping that the Lannister wouldn't take it personally. 

GoT ( regular): Dearest Kyra - post siege.

Dearest Kyra, 

I am taking the pen in order to write you a short letter. I know I have to be careful because the news of my survival cannot be made public. I just felt that I had to let you know that my sister, the Queen, has been made aware of the feelings your brother and I both share.  She is going to make sure that he is sincere in his desire and I hope that she will give her blessings. 

How are you doing? While awaiting her response, I wanted to hear from you. News from Casterly roc has reached my ears and they are worrisome. I would like to know how you are doing. Do you need any assistance? I would like to request help from my sister?  You have my support, I hope you know that, my dear friend. Once we would sort things out with the siege, I would be allowed to leave King's Landing and I would come to you. 

You have my eternal friendship, 

Best, 

Bäahal Targaryen

Princess of the Seven Kingdoms.

modern Got Headcanon: Best friend

 Bäahal never had a best friend before she met Kyra. For most of her life, she was either ignored by her own family (except for her father and her late mother and later on by Rhaegar before his death), or Daenerys sycophants approached her in hopes to be noticed by her sister. Bäahal accepted their presence because she felt it was better to meet people than to be on her own. Besides, some of them were heirs of wealthy and noble families her sister wanted to conduct business with. Needless to say that the relationships weren't good. They were quite the opposite. The lack of sincerity from the socialites she had in her entourage forced Bäahal into believing that she could never meet genuine people and make genuine friendships, so she gave up on these. That was until she met Kyra Lannister at a fundraiser. 

Bäahal fell in love with her, in a platonic sense of the word (and only because she was already romantically linked with Jaime Lannister at the time of their meeting). Kyra's kindness on the day they met knocked down some of the walls she put up in order to protect her heart. Bäahal instantly wanted to become friends with Kyra, going as far as to introduce her (through the pictures on her phone) to her dogs, Rhaegal, Viseryon, and Drogon. Bäahal was very nervous after the fundraiser because she believed Kyra would never want to see her again and was only nice to her because of the circumstances of their first meeting, so imagine how delighted she was when she was proven wrong? Kyra was sincere, and she showed the young woman some interest. 

Bäahal lowered her walls upon their second meeting, deciding that Kyra had passed her test and proved herself to be true to her. She enjoyed her company and allowed herself to imagine spending her time with Kyra for the rest of her life. She felt that she could confide in the blonde woman. She felt that Kyra could give her support, affection, and understanding, all the things she has always lacked in her life. She believed that she could listen to Kyra, give her some support (especially when it comes to her career but also her romantic life if needs to be), but also hang out and do mundane things like going to a restaurant, to a nightclub, to the movies without worrying about whether or not the person she's with is lying through her teeth. 

This friendship is very new and very beautiful to Bâahal who is afraid she would not be good enough to remain friends with Kyra. She worries her spontaneity and her tendency to run her mouth without thinking or get excited would overwhelm her calmer and more collected friend and dread being left behind. Bäahal doesn't believe that she can maintain relationships or be a good friend to people since she had not been given the opportunity to be one. So she's very excited about her friendship with Kyra but also very cautious because she worries Kyra would get tired of her and want to leave. Maybe with some time, she'd be more confident in her ability to be a good friend to Kyra. 

GoT (modern): Muse and model

 Bäahal was so happy. She made a friend, a true friend. Was it possible that the Lannister heiress was truly a friend? Was it possible that they were able to bond? She wanted to believe in this newfound friendship. She wanted to believe that she found someone who saw her as she was and embraced her as she was. She wanted to believe that they would be able to spend time together and share their common interests. Bäahal was so happy to receive the support of her friend. She had always wanted to dance for someone and to see that she could finally be able to dance for one of them was exciting for the silver head. She would work hard on the next dance number just for her friend. She was also excited at the idea of wearing Kyra designs. She was a model so she would be able to show off her friend's work. The young woman couldn't help herself but smiled from ear to ear, thinking that it was quite extraordinary to find love and friendship in the same family, but it was warm and it felt good. 

GoT: new year!

"I pray the seven gods, Old and New, to be favored by them. I pray to the seven gods, Old and New, to have my sister's blessings. I know that the year to come will be filled with challenges. I know the world would be against us, should we be blessed by my sisters. I know our lives would be put on the line, because I chose you, because I loved you and because you're not dead. I know plenty would try to get revenge for what your House did. Your brother and sister are working tirelessly in order to restore the name of your family, and I know that you would do it. I trust Lady Kyra and I trust you.

I have never doubted you because I saw the man you were. I know the man you are. I know the real you, the one others don't want to see. I trust you, Jaime. I trust you with my life and I trust you with my heart and soul. So. I am ready to do anything in my power to protect you and your family. I will obey my sister, even if that breaks my heart because I am loyal to her. Still, I pray. Still, I hope. Still, I wish that the gods would favor me and that we would be together. It would be the greatest gift they could do to me, the greatest after they gave me a family."

Got (regular): Letters to Kyra 5

My dearest Kyra,

I dream of the day we would be able to see each other again. I dream of the warm embrace you gave me when I departed from Casterly Roc. I dream of the gentle touch you gave me as you reassured my heart of your friendship.

I still worry about the fact I might not see you again. Perhaps, those are the remnants of the siege against me. Perhaps it's the uncertainty of tomorrow and what could happen to Jaime. Perhaps I am worried about the war you might lead against those who don't want you to rule.

I keep you in my thoughts, and I long for the day we can see each other again, my dear friend. My true friend. I know I love you. Please, be assured of that genuine affection I have for you. for it would last forever.

Yours truly,

Bäahal Targaryen, Princess of the Seven Kingdom"

GoT: Longing lover

 "I am enjoying life in ways I never thought I would. You made me a believer again. 

I want to show you the world. I want to share your life. I just...It just feels so right to be by your side. 

I might be asking too much. Perhaps it's not the right moment. Perhaps it would never be. I am just hoping for a day where we would see each other in the light. I long for the day where we would have "our time" at "our place". 

I long for a life with you. I fell head over heels for you. Bite me! it's just the truth and I am dying to tell you."

Red and Gold: Waiting on Dany's approval

 // Long time no see. 

My Dearest Kyra, 

It has been a while since we last wrote to each other. I miss you. I long for the day I would be able to visit Casterly Roc and hold you in my arms again. How have you been? How have you dealt with your political opponents? Could I call them that? I assume I could since they don't want to accept your ruling and they have been defiant towards you. I know they believe that without Jaime you are but a frail woman but they should know that they ought to be careful next to a lion. 

Life has been softer on my side. Truth be told, your brother Tyrion has even been sweeter towards me. His first duty and his loyalty go to my sister, same as mine, but he also made sure that I was doing fine and I wasn't breaking down. If I were, to be honest with you, I had a hard time accepting distancing myself from Jaime. I had a hard time not reaching out to him, holding him, kissing him. I had to keep my feelings to myself and I have to say that I suffocated from not being able to express my love. 

My loyalty goes to my sister first, then to you and Jaime. I made a promise I intend to keep. Daenerys accepted to reconsider the situation and I made efforts to socialize again with my family, hence why it is softer for me. I will submit to the decision of my sister but I still keep hope that it would favor us. I hope to see you very soon, my beloved friend. I hope to see you, very soon. 

With love, 

Bäahal Targaryen

Princess of the seven kingdoms

Modern GoT : Lights on.

Modern GoT : Lights on.

Targaryen's palace gym, 11:30 pm.

Bäahal had just finished her routine and quickly slid on the floor to her sports bag that was at the corner. She sat on the floor, heavily breathing as she was trying to catch up and let her purple hues stare at the room. She ran her hand over her neck and tapped the top of her huge bun, just to make sure her hair was still in place. It was an immense gym, built by Aerys because he wanted his family to stay healthy and stay out of the public eye. He knew Bäahal loved to dance and built a room just for her, with enough privacy so the others wouldn't pry on her work and deride it. She would spend countless hours in this room, sweating, bleeding, and crying but it was her solace during the years that followed Aerys' death. Tonight was no exception as she danced herself to the point of bleeding from her feet.

She removed her shoes and grabbed the medical kit she kept in her bag. Focused, the silver-haired heiress cleaned her feet with alcohol, hissing at the sting she felt when she dabbed the light cotton disk. Frustrated, she groaned and resumed cleaning her feet more ferociously. When she danced, the ebony Targaryen felt free, and for the 20 minutes her new routine lasted, she almost forgot her life. She could only focus on her dance, on how she enjoyed the music she picked, and how free she was in this gym, where nobody could find her and judge her. Now that the music was gone and all that was left were her thoughts, the young woman felt lost. Bäahal had always been in her own company, for fuck sake, her family nicknamed her « Lonely » because of her step-mother. She had always had trouble bonding with others, mostly because they were afraid of her sister and brother. Most didn't want to deal with the sister of the cruel Viserys but also didn't want him to retaliate (little did they know he didn't care for Bäahal) so they stuck around, but it remained empty and shallow. Most eventually avoided her altogether, mostly because they were close to Daenerys -as in, close friends- and knew of Dany's complicated feelings for her sister. It was a lose-lose situation for her.

Fortunately, in the underground dance scene, she was able to make good friends, people who didn't know it was her because she used a black wig and wore sunglasses. They were able to respect her as a dancer and watch her dance. Valeria, a ballet-trained dancer, and runner of one of the most famous underground dance clubs was some sort of mentor for Bäahal. She was the only one who knew her true identity but decided to keep their relationship professional only. It was still something. She trained her, watched and reviewed her routines, taught her new movements. She was the closest of a friend, she could have asked for. Dancing in complete anonymity also gave her a sense of freedom, of pure joy and she was good at it, excellent even, but not perfect yet. However, as much as she was happy with her dance, she knew it wasn't enough. As a matter of fact, meeting Jaime forced her to admit that she wasn't very happy with the life she led and couldn't possibly always be sorry for being herself. Jaime met her and he didn't run away. He didn't want to change her and he certainly didn't judge her for being an out of wedlock kid, a product of a cheating heart with a woman who didn't ask for this.

Sunni loved Aerys II. She loved him with all her heart and had not planned to fall in love with him. She tried her best not to reconnect or continue once they did link up but failed. She failed so much she ended up getting pregnant with Bäahal. Yes, it was bad. A married man shouldn't be having an affair with someone else. Aerys played it really wrong and ended up hurting everyone in the process. He made Sunni a homewrecker. She was ready to raise her child alone, and did so for years yet... she couldn't refuse a father to see their child, so Aerys met Bäahal when she was born. He fell in love with his daughter and made sure he visited her often and watched her grow. Bäahal had tried to be mad at him, at both of them, and sincerely was for a few years upon learning the truth about her origins. Yet, love took over, love conquered it all. She loved both her parents, understood their feelings, wanted to make amends for them to his family. She was shunned for this, hated for this, mistreated for years and no matter how resilient, she was, Bäahal ended up thinking that perhaps, she shouldn't have been born. Perhaps, she should apologize for this.

So, dancing was her go-to when she wanted to forget. Dancing gave her meaning, a purpose, a reason to be alive. If she wasn't able to receive love, then she would still give it. Her heart was full of love she gave to people -even those who hated her -and yet couldn't get because they didn't want it. So she gave it to the family dogs: Drogon, Viserion and Rhaegal. While Viserion did die, she still had his brothers she could love fiercely. Yet, it wasn't enough. She was aware of it. Bäahal craved human interactions. She needed love. She dreamed of it. Her parents loved her, Rhaegar cared for her and she wanted to make friends. She loved what she was having with Jaime, regardless of what it was, it was the most connection she ever had with someone. She wanted more.

-TBC-

Letter to Kyra II

 Dearest friend, 

I have found another minute to write to you. I really need to confide in you for I do not know what to do right now and I believe you can understand the situation I am in. My sister hasn't come around yet. She avoids talking about "the urgent matter" when we meet yet, I could see the anger in her eyes. I feel as if I would always lose no matter what I do. My own  sister isn't supportive of my own happiness and I would lie if I said it didn't hurt. It does.  I have sacrificed so much for her, for her victory. I lended her my blade, I gave her my life, I was willing to die for my sister and despite all this, all she can see today is that I chose someone she doesn't approve of. It feels like punishment to me. I know I am being unfair to her, especially since I know what the "urgent matter" did to her and those we love... but still... It feels like punishment to me. 

I don't know what to do, to be honest. I don't know what to say to her. I don't know how to reach out to her. I so wish I could show her that the "urgent matter" is worth being given a second chance. She doesn't  know him... not like I do. She doesn't see him like I do. She doesn't even consider that I might be telling the truth. All she sees is who he was and what he did. All she sees are... ghosts from the past.  How could I get through to her? How could I make her talk to me? It hurts to see disdain and disappointment in her eyes when she's looking at me. my dear friend,  I will confess something. I have missed holding her in my arms. I have missed her warmth and comforting embrace from when I returned. I can see that she's torn between being angry at me and being relieved to see me alive. I can see that she wants to talk to me, make sure I am fine but she prevents herself from coming to me. 

What can I do, Lady Kyra? What would you advise me to do? 

Waiting for your reply, 

Please, rest assured of my eternal friendship

Bäahal Targaryen