N. splove: on Oya

 //// I am doing this for safekeeping. We never know when things could disappear. I want to be able to come back to his words. 

xxx

Oya: 

That badass hunter! 

I know that Dean has been quiet for some time, and you know that I have trouble with him sometimes, but Oya, Oya saved him, both in our story, and she saved him for me. I don’t think I would still have him around at all if it weren’t for her (and you). 

Oya gets Dean in a way that no one else ever possibly could. These two, they make me happy, and they break my heart at the same time. They are two broken people who found each other, and together they make it bearable to keep fighting through. 

We know that they had both been through some serious trauma before they came together. Who else could understand where Dean is coming from, if not someone who has been through some comparable experiences? Oya at least knows what it is to be a hunter, the toll that it can take on you. I love that with Oya, Dean can really be Dean. He can be angry, difficult, playful, confused, irrational, upset, in love… you name it. Dean can be Dean. (And a big part of that is thanks to you. You didn’t just want to write with Dean because he’s “hot”. You wanted to write with Dean because he’s complicated, because he’s a great character. Because of all these nuances, and you wanted to create a character who matched that. Which you absolutely did.)Oya gets Dean. She has the patience to deal with him, to get him through his moods. She’s caring, she’s there for him, and for the rest of Team Free Will. She gets that Dean is a bit of a package deal, that Sam and Castiel are going to be a permanent part of her life now too. She doesn’t resent that. She embraces it and loves Sam and Cas like they are her brothers too. Even though she’s had her issues with angels and was unsure about Castiel. She trusted Dean’s judgement on him and has managed to build a relationship there too. It is everything to Dean that she has done so. 

 She’s strong, strong enough to have gotten through everything that has happened to her and still be standing, to still have hope and still keep fighting.

When they are alone, Dean doesn’t have to keep up that tough guy façade. Oya knows it, and she sees right through it. She gets that Dean isn’t always ready to talk about it or “be real” with what he is feeling. I know that’s frustrating for her sometimes. But she deals with him wonderfully. And thank god she understand that Dean doesn’t always have the words, but he shows her how he feels through his actions. She knows that when he trusts her to go on a hunt on her own, or when he holds her, hugs her, makes these other gestures and concessions to her, this is Dean’s love language. Dean doesn’t trust words, he’s been lied to enough. He trusts what he can see, what people do. And through her actions, Oya has proven that she is someone who can be trusted. She has stayed by him, even in his worst moments. She has fought for him and kept loving him. It goes right down to all the little things, the aprons that she always gets for him, the pictures she sends, the way that she teases him, the way she lets him cook for her. For someone who considered himself to be unlovable and damaged beyond repair, it’s impossible to even express how much that means to Dean.

And she may be a shorty, but she is definitely the boss. Dean loves it when Oya takes control. She is confident and sexy as hell. Every part of her. Dean knows that she can be self-conscious about the scars on her arms, but to Dean those are sexy too. They are the marks of a warrior, a survivor. And he is there to reassure her too in those moment when she doubts herself. They are there for each other, always, and I love that. Everything they do is always so emotionally charged, it is what drives both of them. They are the perfect compliment to one another. Both of them are strong. Both of them are weak. But they hold each other up and they keep going.